I wonder: can someone lose their gift from lack of exercise? Because sometimes I'm afraid that is what happened to me. As a child, I used to draw all the time, it was like breathing to me. I couldn't live a single day without drawing something. Than in high-school, an art high-school, there was too much drawing. My school day started at 8 a.m. and ended at 8 p.m. most of the times. There were regular classes, than studio hours: drawing, painting, sculpting. At the end of my four years in high-school, I was tired and completely fed up. I abandoned my calling. I gave up on my gift.
Years have passed...now I find myself wanting to draw, beginning something and not liking the rezult. I feel somehow betrayed by my gift, even though I know I'm entirely to blame. I know I lost my touch, and I have to work on it again, but sometimes I fear. I'm thinking I was punished for abandoning my gift by taking it away from me...by who? I don't know, God, nature... I so hope that's not true, and that is only a stupid fear. I'm planning to get it back and start exercising, drawing, even if I will not like what I get. My friends and my family keep telling me it is still there, that they wouldn't be able to do what I do, draw like me, not in a million years.
I pray they are right, and my gift is still there. Wish me luck!
